This Is How You Turn Ruminating Thoughts Into Shields of Armour

Cry through the pain, learn from the lessons so that no one ever hurts you in this manner again.

Sujona Chatterjee
3 min readJul 9, 2023
Photo by Miquel Parera on Unsplash

“Sometimes there is no darker place than our thoughts, the moonless midnight of the mind.”
— Dean Koontz

We often find ourselves ruminating on the same thoughts. It’s like an itch that never goes away. Especially when you feel cheated, rejected, or hurt. The fact that someone had the audacity to treat you that way pricks you and you just don’t want the bleeding to stop.

The scar is so deep that the wound seems to become a part of your body that always existed. Sounds dramatic, but those who know what I mean can surely relate.

But at some point, in the day, distraction does take over. For a split second, you will deviate and focus on the task in front of you. However, whenever there is a vacant moment, the thought slips right in.

As days go by, the intensity of the pain fades. It’s still there but you manage to deal with it. That’s where the magic begins. The magic of acceptance.

Something unfortunate happens and the initial reaction is of shock and denial. You just cannot accept the facts and look for unhealthy ways to justify your side of the story. ‘There was nothing wrong with me, they just didn’t see how good I am, their loss not mine’ and the list of reasons go on. Until we finally step away from the situation to see how we must move on.

Moving on begins when we finally have the courage to accept. Once we see things for what they are, we somehow unleash the beast within and begin on the journey of self-healing.

Humans are fascinating. They can adapt and be resilient if they are given the right tools. Well-wishers, therapy, crying, meditation and journaling our such tools that have the potential to heal from scars that are buried deep within. But since we don’t want to hear the truth, face our fears and acknowledge the faults within, we find it easier to wallow in our sorrow alone.

But life somehow finds a way to lift you up. Every time that you fall, a silver lining comes your way to show you what lies ahead.

We often underestimate the healing power of crying. When we intensely feel pain, the body’s outlet is the stream of tears. When you cry, it feels like someone is pounding on your chest and with each blow the pain erupts and falls through large droplets.

But the moment you’re done crying, it feels like dark clouds finally move and make space for sunshine. You feel that heavy burden lift your chest and you can finally see what is meant for you ahead.

Ruminating thoughts often have a way of controlling us. But we can turn the table around and take charge. The moment I cry, write, meditate and face what is truly bothering me, it’s out of my system. We finally let go of control and don’t see ourselves as the victim. Rather we see ourselves as fortunate because through it all we learnt one more lesson, we gained one more experience and most importantly we gained one more armour that will ensure no one else will have the right to hurt you, fool you or trick you into believing something that was never meant for you anyway.

Thanks so much for your time!



Sujona Chatterjee

Living life the only way I know how — one day at a time.