Do You Ever Wonder, What’s the Point in Being Good?
When kindness is your default setting, no matter how much you’ve been hurt, you just cannot stop being good.
“Striving to be good is the ultimate struggle of every man. Being bad is easy, but being good requires sincere commitment, discipline and strength. We have to work hard every day just to remain good.”
― Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem
We all get to a point in life where we think, ‘what’s the point in being good?’ We feel disheartened and feel sorry for ourselves. It’s not that our goodness stemmed from receiving something in return. But we cannot lie to ourselves, as the least we expect from us being good is that people would be honest about their intentions.
So many times you must have gone out of your way to be there for someone. But a few months down the line, you see their true intentions. For some strange reason, I feel that if we knew their intentions from the start, at least we would have respect for them rather than disappointment.
As a child I would always wonder why the good souls have to withstand the most terrible circumstances of life whereas some lead life effortlessly after inflicting pain. I used to wonder is anyone ever going to hold such people accountable for their mistakes?
Over time when I developed some sense of maturity, I realised that everyone receives their dues. Everyone learns their lessons in time and most importantly, everyone realises where they went wrong and who they owe an apology.
We meet countless people in our life. Like seasons, people come and go and with every passing season, we learn lessons. But during the change in season there are times when we just break down and want to inflict pain. We seek revenge and have thoughts which we feel later guilty about. But our moral compass is so strong that we choose to vent in healthy ways. I still write letters when my anger hits the roof and then tear the piece of paper to shreds. It’s so therapeutic that while I am tearing the pieces, tears flow too. And that removes all toxicity from my mind and body.
After this entire episode, my tank of goodness fills up because that is my default setting. Only this time, my setting is attuned towards those who have my best interests at heart. And those people you only come across when you first, meet a lot of people. From them, some hurt you, some walk away and some eventually remain. Those who remain are the ones who accept the good and bad in you. Who make no judgements about your actions and stand by you through thick and thin.
I get it, sometimes it’s tough to let go. It’s tough to sit back and allow the healing to take place when it feels like the pain of the betrayal will never go away. But when you look back on your previous triumphs, you fought hard. You broke into a million pieces back then and you picked each one of those pieces, stuck them together with your tears and evolved into a kinder individual than before.
So yes, there will be countless moments when you wonder, what’s the point in being good when life hurts you so bad? But always remember, for good souls like you and me, kindness is our default setting. Sometimes we need to crash to identify the viruses. Once we pick ourselves up, focus on being the best versions of ourselves, the ones who hurt us, the ones who stamped on our feelings, the ones who walked away will matter no more. What will matter is that we continued being our kind, selfless, positive and joyous selves. And that according to me is the highest form of victory.
Thanks so much for your time!